I was listening to a podcast a few days ago as I was walking home from the nursery run and the interviewee said something that felt like a slap to the back of the head. The interviewee said: “I am a people pleaser.” I immediately felt seen as the internet would say, as I am also, or maybe was a people pleaser.
While I have gotten better at saying no, I think I often feel responsible for everyone’s happiness both in a personal and professional capacity, which is unhealthy as I will never make everyone happy all of the time. The weight of feeling responsible for the happiness of people both in my professional and personal life benefits everyone around me, but is fundamentally detrimental to my own happiness. It often feels like you have to shrink yourself and how happy you can be as you tell yourself it is for the greater good. If all your friends or work colleagues are at their happiest then it is worth adjusting your expectations of happiness and how you want to be happy.