Can you believe it’s December? Neither can I. November has been eventful, but it always is, as it’s the month I get another year older and hopefully a little wiser. (Also, shout out to all the November babies reading this!) This year, I’ve really been thinking about what I want and why I want things.

As someone who is a chronic overthinker, some days this year I went into a deep black hole thinking about what I wanted — but what sent me into even more of a spiral was why. As I approached my new age in early November, I started to think more and more about the concept of “having it all” as a woman. It feels like such an archaic and stiff concept that has essentially been an unfair measuring stick, boxing women into expectations we never set ourselves.