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The Struggle To Find Community As A Queer Black Mother

For queer parents like Soraia S, a bisexual mother and nail artist based in Liverpool, navigating parenthood under multiple intersections has been a journey filled with both joys and challenges. Although she recognises the privileges that come along with being a femme, such as not finding it as hard to ‘fit in’ in parenting spaces, she also admits that, “Building a chosen family has been essential for me, especially when it has become the norm to face rejection from biological family members. However, I am extremely grateful and blessed to have people who provide me with unconditional love and support for me and my child.”

Over generations, we’ve witnessed queer and trans communities advocating for everyone seeking to build lives with their “chosen families”. Although shows like Pose, Noah’s Arc, P-Valley and The L Word do give us a glimpse of how valuable and crucial this journey is for many within the LGBTQ+ community, across time the tools and resources to build these communities have often been scarce or far to reach. Plus, Black queer parents like Soraia struggle to be seen.

“As an LGBTQ+ black mother, the communities are scarce or nonexistent. The LGBTQ+ Black communities that I’ve heard of are mostly night or cultural events. Nothing related to parenthood.”